What a better way to jump back into my regularly scheduled ranting is by reflecting on my wedding. Now that three months have gone by, I’ve been able to reflect on lessons learned, and shed light on some lesser talked about topics.

My wedding was amazing. Truly. Aside from the most important part, marrying my best friend, the wedding planning part went off without a hitch. My vendors were on point, timing was impeccable, and it was what I had envisioned. 

Now for the lesser talked about topics:

the day is not about you.

It is. I think most brides love living up the princess mentality. Hell, why not? However, frustration stems from everyone around ‘helping’ you but in reality, they are running around with their heads cut off. And this is not something I enjoyed. I fielded questions I’ve answered a dozen times. When do we leave? Where do we go? Do I look fine? There were moments when I felt alone, even though I was surrounded by people who wanted to help me.

rehearsal was my xanax.

There is no doubt I was filled with excitement, but the days leading up to the wedding anxiety really set in. I went as far as hunting down anxiety medication thinking it would help provide a layer of calm. Oddly enough, the exercise of the ceremony rehearsal helped immensely. Our officiant was super calm, relaxed and his experience really shined. More than just walking up and down the aisle, knowing our cues, we were able to practice our vows. I felt more at ease after the rehearsal, and ready to take on the big day with less weight on my shoulders.

the wedding dress you envision, is almost never what you actually purchase.

Before I browsed online or through magazines, I knew I wanted a dress with straps. Far too often I saw brides pulling up their dress, and they looked uncomfortable. Thanks to Pinterest it was easy to pull looks I was attracted to. Once I reviewed my board, to my surprise more than half of them were strapless. I visited about 5 stores and tried on 15-20 dresses. I got a little worried toward the end, but fell in love with a Maggie Sottero light gold, strapless dress. And with many rounds of alterations, I was packed in tightly!

Look I was going for:

 The dress. 

I missed cocktail hour.

If anyone knows me, knows I love happy hour. My favorite part about weddings is cocktail hour, catching up with old friends and dishing about ceremony highlights. But if couples don’t want to see one another before the ceremony, you’re locked into taking photos post-ceremony. If I had any regrets about the day, it was not interacting more with my guests—and finding a way to join them for a glass of vino.

Planning Tips::

Limit your DIY projects: Yes Style Me Pretty highlights the cutesy, vintage decor but really, behind the look are countless hours trying to pin down these projects. I spent months searching for green-colored bottles, second-hand napkins and making fabric chandeliers. I am happy I did it but it definitely added to stress levels.

Reception and sweetheart tables at my wedding. A lot of work went into these simplistic looks.

Pick a location that does the work for you: Read the fine-print. Do they clean up? Do they provide tables and chairs? Most brides get blind-sided because they are unaware of the heavy lifting associated with the venue contract.

Get on Pinterest. Navigating decor and fashion boards on Pinterest truly cut my planning time in half. Do it.

Let the expert be the expert. It’s not your full-time job to be baker, music mixer or florist. Ask tons of questions and be directive, but ultimately let your vendors do their job.

Let your personalities come through. Weddings can easily diminish a couple’s personality if you dive right into a particular look. Find ways to showcase your sense of humor, or some of your favorite activities as a couple.

We had a little fun with our wedding cake. I immediately hit ‘purchase’ when I saw these whale cake toppers on Etsy.

Get in the mood: Take advantage of being the bride-to-be. Watch every wedding-themed show on TLC. And once, make your fiancé watch an episode of Bridezillas with you. This will aid in displaying how normal you really are during the planning process.